Hook, Line, Sinker: Starting Strong in Short Fiction

Anastasia Barbato
Sep 1
4 min read

A “hook” is what grabs your reader’s shirt and pulls them in close. It gathers everyone around the campfire. It’s the meet-cute where the future lovers feel that first “spark” of chemistry that attracts them together.

Hooks are essential to every piece of writing; especially now, when a reader’s attention is so often hijacked by a well-placed ad or a doomscroll (we’ve all been there). But especially when you’re working with a limited word count—say, writing a short story or a Substack post—and limited attention, you don’t have the luxury of rambling sentences that ease into the story. You have to pique your reader’s interest, set the tone, and hint at the stakes all in the first sentence.

Let’s break it down using examples from our upcoming short story anthology, In My Element. The authors of the anthology—winners of our 2025 short story contest—worked with our editors to trim, refine, and polish their stories for publication, including opening with some kick-ass hooks.

Here’s how our stories introduce themselves.

Fishing reel, reeling in the line over the water — Laura Stanley, Pexels

Start with Movement, Not Explanation

Exposition slows momentum, especially in short stories. Instead of setting the scene with background, try starting in the middle of something happening.

Two mice roam their cage as if everything is normal, as if they hadn’t been disintegrated only a month earlier. — “If Only The Mice Could Talk” by Bud Robertson

We’re immediately asking questions. Where are these mice? Why were they disintegrated, and why aren’t they now? Starting with action plants the reader directly into the world and invites them to keep going to find out more.

Imply Stakes

You don’t need to reveal everything right away, but your opening line should hint that something matters. Emotional, physical, relational—something needs to be at risk.

Reanimation had always been a man's game, one they played with a two-move advantage. — “Postmortem Galvanism Applications by Dr. M. Wolston” by Bob Wentzel

Immediately, we’re dropped into the protagonist’s world and the stakes she plays with: trying to get ahead of men in her field in the realm of “reanimation” (what is that, anyway? Now we’re curious).

Use Voice to Your Advantage

In short stories, character voice is one of the fastest ways to establish the tone and personality of the piece. A strong, specific voice makes readers feel like they’ve already met your protagonist and places them in their shoes from the jump.

Punching Leera Kavanaugh in the face is the highlight of my day. — “Fall of the Lightcaller” by Anastasia Barbato

Hi, my name is David, and I’m a recovering werewolf. — “The One You Feed” by Katariina Ruuska

These lines are direct and speak to personal experience with the voice of the protagonist. We want to know who they are, what they’ve been through, and if Leera even deserves the punch in the face (she probably does).

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Surprise the Reader

An unexpected detail or contradiction can jolt the reader into curiosity. But surprise doesn’t have to mean shock value. It’s equally effective to say something unexpected, as long as it places the reader in the world you’ve created.

I stared at the hole in the cork tile floor long and hard enough to make it go away if it had been a figment of my imagination. — “The Hole” by Ann Boehmer

"Dragon, you say? " — “Stop Dragon My Heart Around” by Erik Engman

Knowing that the protagonist wants the hole to “go away” is enough to pique our curiosity about where it came from and why; and when starting the story with a question as the other quote does, we ask ourselves if dragons are, in fact, commonplace in their world…and what that means for the characters.

Anchor the Reader, Even in Mystery

But sometimes, you don’t need to use details; you can draw them in with mystery instead. But, readers still need to feel like they have some footing in your world. Anchoring your opening in a concrete detail (a specific place, person, or image) helps them visualize and emotionally invest without revealing too much of the plot.

The mist had teeth in Saltmere. —"The Elemental Child" by Jade Scardham

We can physically see and feel the mist having “teeth” and we’re placed into the uninviting, mysterious world of Saltmere from the moment we step into the story.

The Takeaway: Hooks Should Earn the Catch

A good opening line should earn your reader’s trust from the moment their eyes land on the page. It promises the reader that their time will be well spent. Whether you lead with tension, voice, detail, or surprise, what matters most is that your first line makes us want the second. And that momentum is everything.

Want to see these strong openings in action?

In My Element, our second-annual short story anthology, features 20 stories about wild and wonderful worlds, each with elemental surprises and alchemical transformations. The genres range from contemporary to speculative, from fantasy to thriller, from drama to comedy—each tale masterfully executed by our incredible authors and woven together like a well-made tapestry. Pre-orders start in a couple months, with publication toward the end of the year.

While you wait, check out our first anthology, Trouble in Paradise, where twenty authors explored the prompt “Utopia… or is it?”

Order from Amazon here, or from our website here (hint: buying from our website supports us directly and also gives the option of signed copies—something you can’t get anywhere else!).

Thanks for tuning in, and remember: keep writing!

Which hook is your favorite? Tell us in the comments!